Highlights of weekend

I am a long-winded person. In order not to flood my own tag board, I shall use this space to reply your responses. Haha.

I extended an invitation to my bf to come over for lunch on Saturday. To add a little colour to our routine weekend, I thought I should cook him a meal. When was the last time I cooked for him??? Mmmm.... I think it was like 4 years ago?? Ya, not long after we became an item. I cooked fried rice for him and my brother too. I thought fried rice should be simple and well, I had cooked that for myself before, so with a 3 person share, it shouldn't be a big problem yea?

BUT!!!

I was terribly wrong. Sigh... I vaguely remembered that the fried rice was pale aka no-colour, which also meant it didn't look appetising at all. True enough, it REALLY was tasteless. Mummy told me to add soy sauce then the rice will look brown and delicious mah.. And, it did taste not bad when I cooked for myself.. But, that fateful day when I tried to impress my bf, I don't know why, but it didn't taste good.

I am a bad bad bad cook :(

Until now, my bf still remember my FIRST cooked meal for him. So, what did he request for lunch last Saturday?? Instant noodles with egg!!!!! WA LAU. An insult to my sincerity to want to spice up our weekend. He said, "First time, so give you a non-challenging task. Hehehehehe." Bish!!!!!

Luckily, the instant noodles wasn't bad. Hahahahaha. Like the Hong Kong's Gong Zai Noodles, minus the pork chop. Kekekeke.

What shall I do next leh?? Maybe I should try to find sushi recipe and also tempura. Cos he loves Japanese food.

Really, all of you who have learnt F&N are better cooks than me. I am a straight F there. Whenever we had cooking sessions during Home Economics in Secondary School, I was always the one to cut and prepare the ingredients while my friend would cook. I took over at the stove only when the teacher was nearby, to put on a show for her.

I used to even have a rehearsal with my family when I cooked for my first bf. My family was the guinea pigs to try my cooking which sometimes was really bad. Poor Papa. Whenever he saw something funny on the table, he always say 'experiment again'. Hohohohohoho...

Have I told you that my VERY FIRST egg was really charred till it was really black through and through?? Hahaha.

Well, I may be very good in conduction, convection & radiation but when it comes to practise with the fire in front of me, it is a totally different story :p

No topic

Anyone wants tuition?

It may not be you. It could be your neighbour, cousin, brother or sister.

I teach Maths and Science, Secondary level.

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Hahahahaha.
See, I am working hard to save for my wedding, if there is any.

I am starting to give tuition tomorrow. I am so happy and looking forward to it. Finally, I have found another thing to occupy my free time.

Not bad for a change.

I am learning to drive now.. alternate Saturdays. It is fun! But scary at the same time. Too many things to take care of at the same time. Rear mirror, side mirror, front, blind spots, signal lights, clutch, brake, accelerator, hand gear... all at the same time. Although I am looking forward to the next lesson, it is pretty scary to think that I may be hitting the road soon. I had been driving circles in a car park for the last 2 lessons. I have no idea if my instructor will make me do it again next Saturday.

I am giving tuition, something which I enjoy - teach and impart knowledge. No admin work to do, no meetings to attend and no worries about worksheets or exams. I just teach! It is a wonderful moment when I teach. Really looking forward to Sunday. Only one small little complain - I have to sacrifice my sleep in the morning. BUT! It is all for a good course yeah?

Mmm... what should I do next leh? Maybe I will go learn how to knit (hehehehe wink wink) and I will probably go learn Japanese?

Slowly...

I love weekend. Do you?

(I am losing the motivation to continue to write in blog! Kok Shen, what should I do?? Hahaha)

What is money?

The above is it - money.

Just how important is that piece of paper? In this very practical society, very unfortunately, that piece of money determines how much privileges and respect you get from people around you.

I was out with a group of friends last night and we were discussing why some people can just become richer and richer while we always remain as poor as we are. Funny, some people simply have that touch, they are constantly thinking of ways of making their money generate more money and it seems effortless? I don't know. How I envy them sometimes, especially when I want to go for tour, I always become so broke after the trip.

I had been thinking of this question very frequently these few days: How important is money?

My godson ever asked me this very philosophical question: Why did mankind invent money?

Just how important is money? I wonder.

There are people around me who are working hard (like me) to earn money. Day in, day out, we are looking forward to our pay day. We are constantly checking our bank account to see how much the balance is and always telling ourselves "cannot shop anymore". In the end, when we see the SALE sign, wow!!! Who say cannot shop?? Must grab ah.. =.=" Thus, the wallet is always tight at the end of the month and we hate it the most when the postman or e-bill comes to chase us for payment.

Second, there are people who works hard for their dreams but get paid little for the pursuit of it. But, they are not tired. They strive harder to prove to the rest that it is a dream worth realising and hugging to the hope that one fine day, their dream will make it big.

Third, there are people who just need to sit at home and money will pour into their wallets. Arg! How I love and hate this type of people.

Fourth, there are people who have people working for them. Quoted from Jun Fu, it is a zero dollar equation (his own theory). They earn millions by making the people who worked for them work harder but pay than lesser than they are worth. Smart right?

Whatever it is, I had been trying to ask my mother and my bf for their opinion on the feasibility of me changing to event management. The first thing they asked: How is the pay? When I told them that it will be lesser than what I am earning now(actually much much less) and in addition, it will be long hours. My mother asked me, "Why is it that other people earn more when they change job and you get lesser and lesser? When will you get your first 3k?" My bf shut me up with, "Do you know that fresh graduates are earning 3.3k now? If they give you less than 2.5, then your 3 years of experience in teaching is equivalent to nothing."

How hurting those comments can be, you can never imagine. My heart broke and sank when both of my dearest people threw me such a wet blanket. I was praying with the thinnest strand of hope that maybe they will give me the support and tell me to go ahead.

Money is really the issue here.
I feel the stress and expectation that I need to earn 3k before I reach 30. Damn. This is such a cruel place. Just when I thought I could (MAYBE) go for a more challenging job and really test out my limits and what I want, I got pulled back to reality.

SIGH SIGH SIGH SIGH......

Anyway, I am going to start tuition this Sunday. At least that will be an extra income (not subjected to CPF and tax - please don't tell IRAS: I am already paying 500+ of tax lor!!). Anyone wants tuition? I teach Maths and Science but my charges are high. Enquiries, please call or sms me.

I am dead serious.

A wonderful weekend

Hohohohohohohoohohohohohoohohohohohohoohohoho

..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........
..........I love you, I miss you, I love you, I miss you.........

Hehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehhehehehehehehe

Blue Thursday

I used to look forward to Thursday because Friday will be the next day and I can have my weekend to relax....

I don't know why but I feel extremely blue this morning. Probably it is because of the rain.. well.. maybe not, I don't know.

A colleague from the next department had left the company yesterday and is starting her new work today. I went out with WL last night and I slept at 1am. So, basically I am pretty tired now.

People had been asking me how is my new job, do I like it, how are you coping, do I enjoy it etc since the first day I stepped in. I don't know if that is the way they show concern and willingness to help newbies or is it that they are preparing me for the storm ahead.

Actually, I am feeling very uncomfortable with my current situation now. You know, just plain uncomfortable feeling which you can't really point your finger to the source of it.

Besides the fact that I can rest after work now (no need to mark worksheets anymore), during the day, the administration work that I am doing seems unclear and directionless and well, I feel meaningless. Maybe it is because I have not been given the bulk of the workload yet but I can't help myself comparing what I used to do and what I am doing now. Human beings are funny creatures. Uncle J's words kept popping into my mind. Come to think about it, his words are not always rubbish. You probably will need to reflect on what he said and well, maybe less than 50% of his advice is useful in the end.

I had promised myself that I would not return to school as a full-time teacher, which means I may consider being an adjunct teacher.

I had been urging myself to give myself more time to adapt to the new job, at least till I get my bonus beginning of next year (hehe..)

I felt very inspired by WL's new work! She is into event management and that was what I had wanted to do. In this new job, she gets to go overseas because the bulk of her company's business is international. I really envy her and I asked myself if I want that type of lifestyle..

Consider this:
1) I have NO experience at all for this industry...
2) The company seems extremely fast-paced, which in a way, is a little opposite of my current company. I can't stand the waiting time to get information from another person!
3) It will be like teaching, no free time after work, no fixed knock off time, no weekends maybe, little sleep when events are near - which also means it will be energy sapping
4) The big factor: PAY. Definitely, I would not be drawing the income that I am getting now.
5) It doesn't help when 30 is near the corner. It doesn't help when the hectic nature of the job means I would be seeing less of my bf and how can we ever find time to settle down?
6) Can energy sapping job be a long-termed committment job? I mean, if I do not like it and prefers to have a more stable job, I would really be 30 or beyond. Age is a big enemy. No experience, old female candidate - who would want to hire me in the end?

BUT, the lure is tempting.....

DAMN IT! Give us till next year ba... In the meantime, what else can I do besides to bury the urge and probably TRY VERY HARD to stay positive in the new job?

Big SIGH....

Consequences of being big mouth

Just when the computer clock hit 5.40pm on Tuesday evening, my boss came out and asked my colleague how was the progress of the work he told her to do... She said it wasn't ready and he started to question her... "If you can't do it alone, you should have asked for help early." And, the next thing I knew, "Pau Ling, can you please help ......"

SIAN! =.=" because I was just that one second away to clicking that START button on the monitor screen and shutting down the computer!

I can't say I can't help my colleague right? I mean, I am still damn new and I have to be a team player isn't it? So, I have to hide my inner frustrations and reply, "Sure, no problem! How can I help?" Furthermore, I had to put on a big bright TPL signature smile :D

So, I said bye bye to my 'boring' office life and started helping my colleague do her work, halfing her present workload. I always think back of what my bf asked me, "Why do they need a graduate to do such admin work?" Good question asked but I don't know the answer. So, I did the manual checking of tonnes of excel spread sheet data.. Did that to the extent that I really felt like tearing the hardcopy excel spread sheets into bits and pieces.

The next time someone told you during an interview that the work is very challenging, don't be as naive as me to believe that person wholeheartedly. To a certain extent, this tedious checking is challenging because I had stopped so many times to ask myself aloud, "Isn't there a better way to do this?" Till now, the answer had not been found and so I continued the mindless checking... Until, my boss got impatient with the people who input the data and got everyone to sit down and trashed out all the differences. Well, that meeting was 4 hours long! When the meeting in brd was a simply waste of my precious afternoon, the meeting here is always like a learning and eye-opening experience. You want to see how adults brainstorm their intelligence and outtalk each other, look forward to the working world just make sure you stay out of trouble.

Anyway, our boss treated us to a lunch at the Turf City on Thursday. That was the most agonising lunch I had ever had so far. It was to formally welcome the new-comers to the department. The first new-comer started introducing himself like this, "I would like to introduce you to open source programming and suggest that we meet for an hour each week so that I can tell you the beauty of this..." I was like HUH!! Simi open source programming??! This is so computer engineering lor, come on, get a life! If you don't want a life, stay away from me... =.=!

Then the food came... first dish - shark's fins soup. The waitress helped to ladle out the soup into small bowls and the natural reaction after she had done that was to? Take the biggest bowl and start eating and fight for the vinegar and pepper right? Alright, everyone at the table weren't normal because from the first dish till the last dish, the food had to sit there for at least 5 min before anyone took the move to start taking their share! I was like, HELLO, scholars. I know all of you are intellects, but it is lunch time and I am hungry. Can't anyone please start eating?? Because I am new and I am a 'demure & resolute' woman (made in TKGS), I have to behave like a well-behaved girl and wait for the seniors to start... Unbearable. Can you imagine how long that big bowl of baked crabs sat on the table?? At least 10min lor!!! And I was like, the crab is so delicious, yum yum, but you can only take one piece ok? Why??

Because you can't behave like a childish little girl who is out with your Daddy and Mummy and start to grab at every piece of crab you like... Restrain.. Take one only..

And my boss actually said, "Lunch is good. We really should have more department lunches."

I was like, "Please! A lunch with scholars talking about open source programming, journal papers by other psychologists etc - Sorry, it is just not my cup of tea."

Plus, the constant effort to always behave and do things smart because my boss said " I hate working with stupid people" and his constant "that clown did this... that..." All these aren't helping at all.

Challenging?

Yes! Because I have to dig really hard for the intelligent TPL and proved to him that HEY! You have got a smart employee here ;)

2nd week at the job

First, I seriously seriously miss school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Arg!!!!!!!!!

I miss my 4EB together with all their lame jokes and quick-witted conversations. I miss 4EA, 4EC, 4ED, 4N2, 5N1 and 5N2... I miss teaching..

WHY?

Because it is much more lively than sitting in front of the computer all day, waiting for lunch time and then knock off time. I met Vasughi for dinner last Friday and the first thing she said,"Your face is rounder now!" OMG! That is the consequences for having breakfast every morning (it is free cos the company provides different breakfasts for us everyday - GOOD welfare), for sitting in front of the computer all day and eating lunch on time and going back to computer straight after lunch.

Of course, I only miss the students haha! I DO NOT miss the marking at all! Hehe.. I bet all the teachers are busy setting exam papers now...

Anyway, life in the office is alright just that I am still unclear of my new boss' expectations. He said during a meeting, he hates stupid people. Damn! I must constantly remind myself to be smart and not do stupid and mindless things, that is taxing. Plus, seriously, my corner at the office is boringly quiet!!!! Kill me!! How I missed those days of "Where is your name tag and school badge?" or "Sshh. Read your book!"

Because I am still new, I hardly get calls and well, I was alone in the office today because all the other 3 administration officers were not around. I named myself "Office Alone".

Let me see.
What is one good thing about teaching? --> It is meaningful, really. My new boss said very frankly, whatever we are doing now are all fake because it is all paperwork and planning. Unless the plan gets accepted, otherwise, it will always remain virtual.. WA -o-!
What is one good thing about the new job? --> I am so free after I get home, I have no worksheets to mark, no test/exam papers to set, life has never been so carefree. Haha.

O ya! I had my first driving lesson last Saturday afternoon...

And, not to forget, I had two weeks of itchy and ugly rashes on my legs and hands for the past 2 weeks.. Today is my third day of non-itchiness and non-ugliness...

New work, new lifestyle

WOW!

The long-waited day had come. I reported at my new work place yesterday. Mmm... after being pre-warned by my beloved Uni friends of what to look out for, I would say yesterday was not bad ;)

But it is still too early to judge if I like the new job because the workload hasn't really been handed over to me. But, even before I report for work, my big name had been announced to many big people and when I was being brought around during the induction, they were like "I heard your name and now I finally see you.." Then I was like, what did you hear about me?? It is my first day, HELLO.

So far, I can only say the new job scope is very different from my last one. I was properly inducted at my first day of reporting at this new job, not just thrown into a class of (A) eagerly anticipated students, waiting for me to say something or (B) hyperactive students, walking and shouting around the classroom. Is it because of the nature of work or because of the poorly-run induction programme from the previous work?

I am a little insecure of this new work. I guessed I was too comfortable in my last job and I am really not equipped or prepared for this one. BUT, how can Miss Tan lose confidence so easily right? Like I told Desiree and my other cadets/students, "Don't worry, things will work out in the end." Gee, Miss Tan can do it! I just need some time to re-orientate myself and change my direction and energy.

Talk about energy! WOW. I came home after 12 midnight after my first day of work because I was out watching Transformers with Bao Bei. I was so tired today!!!! Aiyo, do office work like this can really grow fat easily ah! I seldom ate lunch when I was in school, often, I had only one meal in one day, which was dinner. Now, I have free breakfast every morning and I have to go for lunch every afternoon. Minus away the time to queue for food and go toilet, the rest of the time I spend it sitting at the PC. Definitely, I will grow fat in no time!! O MY GOD!

Must use U-Zap now.. Give me strength to move on in my new work.